Saturday, December 15, 2007

I've Had It With You Santa!

Dear Santa,

I'm writing to tell you that I'm ready to line my kids up and come clean on this whole Santa thing. You know, as well as I do, that I do all your shopping and bidding just like for the rest of the family. I'm good-natured enough to let you have all the credit but the stress is going to kill me! Sarah has been changing her mind for the last three weeks on what she is going to ask you for tonight when she sees you at the Ward Christmas Party. My garage is filled with the items she was going to ask for but has changed her mind about.

Sarah is now very set on a Baby Alive Boy & Girl baby. I've researched it and yes the "Boy" baby is anatomically correct. Little does she know, the boy baby is nearly impossible to find and thus when found, it is very expensive. Honestly, Santa, it would be easier for me to conceive a boy baby than to find this Baby Alive Boy doll. (And that's saying a lot seeing as Scott & I have produced 75% girls.) I've tried to talk her out of it stating that I don't think our sweet little girl should have a baby with a "peeny" to which she giggles and laughs hysterically. She tells me she gets to decide what she wants for Christmas from Santa, "and that's final!" We've discussed this at length. Scott wants to know who set up this tradition that you get whatever the heck you asked for anyway! (I have no sympathy for this comment because he doesn't help me either! He is in the same boat as you, Santa. Gets all the credit with no effort at all.)

After yet more research, I've learned that Corolle has a much cuter boy baby, also anatomically correct, and alas it is available. I've convinced Sarah this is the one to ask for. She had me write the exact name down for her: "Corolle Paul Wet and Bath Baby" which she will take with her tonight when she sees you.

Disaster was averted when Ben's first choice item (the i-coaster, out-of-stock everywhere and a very expensive item on the secondhand market) was replaced by the available Roboquad. Emma luckily doesn't fully get it. I have an assortment from which I can attempt to persuade her to choose from.

Frankly, I will sleep much better tonight after the grand meeting is done. I will be penniless (and Scott too) but I will sleep well knowing that I have not been responsible for undoing the magic of Christmas for my children. Even though I am sorely tempted! I just wanted you to know how I am feeling because I believe in open communication.

Until tonight,


Tuesday, December 11, 2007

By Popular Demand

Here's the photo referred to in the previous blog.

Wow! What a kick looking for this picture! Thanks for asking Chelsea! I have discovered that I actually have triplet daughters born in a spread of 6 years. Apparently we have one recipe with minor changes in the ingredients here and there.

Monday, December 10, 2007

10 Tips From a Harried Homemaker

Here's a little diddy I submitted for a ward RS book. Thought it was bloggable so here it is...

  • When trying to measure up to the in-laws as a newlywed, offer something you know how to do well to help with the Thanksgiving meal like filling the glasses with ice. This will prevent the “deer-in-the-headlights” look of panic when you are asked to mash the potatoes.

  • At the beginning of the year, buy only belated birthday cards and send them at the end of each month to family and friends.

  • Keep your house messy so that on the occasion it is clean when someone stops by, they will be pleasantly surprised.

  • Don’t overmix salad dressing in the blender, unless you are trying to make your own mayonnaise.

  • Whoever scrapbooks gets to re-write family history from her own favorable viewpoint.

  • The best way to look thinner in a photo is to learn how to use Photoshop.

  • Don’t forget to turn the car engine off, take the keys out of the ignition and lock the doors before you go into a doctor’s appointment.

  • Don’t say anything to your husband when you realize he spends time every night rearranging the dishwasher before turning it on. Go ahead and continue to load it in a most inefficient manner and be grateful that he is so helpful in the kitchen.

  • Always make sure you have your driver’s license with you if you’re speeding down a residential street on the way to school pick-up and your kids have gotten out of their carseats. When you tell your husband about the incident, be positive. Tell him the police officer was really nice and only ticketed you for just one of your infractions.

  • When your daughter sprinkles cocoa all over her bedroom, scold her firmly but with kindness and then get your camera and photograph it because someday it really will be funny. This is highly recommended for any garden variety messes that take place.

P.S. Note the chin removal...still perfecting that art.

Thursday, December 06, 2007

The "Nancy" Pose

Oh, I'm so prolific today but I just read a request for the famous "Nancy" pose. Here's a perfect example....

When time for a photo to be snapped, dash behind anyone. This is much more successful when people are sitting but it can be done when people are standing.

When I get desperate, I have been known to use Photoshop.


I will be lucky to get the Christmas tree in the house, with lights and ornaments before December 24th. Scotty did not convey the message that he adheres to a strict 20-step program to get the tree into the house. He just described about the first 6 steps. We have a long way to go people! The consolation prize is that we'll get to enjoy the Christmas tree until well into January since the take-down process is a 25-step program...

On a separate note...because she is one of our blogreaders, Happy Birthday to my niece, Emily! I have great memories of growing up with her. We have a number of things in common including we both love to play the piano and at any family "work" party growing up, neither of us could really be found working. I remember the days of trying to measure what percentage of her body were her legs, running after her to try to cut a straggler long curl in the back and hearing comments like, "why are your knees so huge" to which I'd answer, "because I'm 13 years older than you!". Have a great day!

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

What's in a Tree?

Finding the right tree is one of the more important Christmas rituals in our family. We used to go to one of those local pop up tree lots. Meaning that they pop up on the corner right before Thanksgiving about as fast as it takes to clear out the pumpkins from the same corner lot after Halloween. This is not a bad thing, however we discovered that this is one of the most expensive options for choosing a tree. (We are standing in front of our chosen tree this year.)Expect to pay $90 to $130 or more for a tree on the "pop up lot". (I'm not even going to discuss flocking ... I've never done it and if I have my way I never will. I am also not going to discuss the fake tree, I know there a lot of believers out there, but after all is said and done what is there to discuss? No scent, no thought, no imagination, no, no, no!)

Eureka! About 2 or 3 years ago we discovered the Home Depot Christmas tree. I have to admit I was a bit weary but I was pleasantly surprised. The trees were fresh and good looking.

(You can tell if a tree is fresh if you take a single needle and bend it in half. If it snaps or breaks in half it is fresh. If it just bends.... find another tree.)

They also have pretty good service (even for Home Depot!)They will give you a fresh cut, and "package" the tree in a nylon netting for easy transporting.

This year we departed from the pop up lot (no surprise) and Home Depot! It came down to time. It would have taken time we just did not have to make to trek to Home Depot and "Find" the tree that belongs to us.

Sidebar... what does "Find" a tree really mean? It means searching the rows of trees looking for that tree that "speaks" to me... er US. I guess you could call me a tree whisperer. At the end of the day I will find the tree that just looks and feels right. That is the only way I can explain it.

Today we picked up the kids from school with the intention to go immediately to find our tree. We passed by Nob Hill Foods and they had set up a pseudo Pop Up Lot. I was of course immediately against the idea, however when I was across from the lot (and when I found out that all the trees were about $35) I heard a tree "speaking" to me. The third tree we looked at we chose. A record for tree whispering.

The Nob Hill pop up lot did not have all the amenities that I am used to at other PUL's like a fresh cut service, a hole already in the base of the trunk, and a wrapped up tree for easy transport. I guess you just have to lower expectations with a supermarket Christmas Tree. Well I am just happy that we were able to find out tree at a very good price and Nancy was happy that we were able to find it quickly. If you think that finding the tree is the end of the story you are sadly mistaken. This is the part of the ritual that drives Nancy crazy. Once we get the tree home we trim it up a bit, and then spray it down with the hose and let it soak in a bucket of water for a couple of days. So the tree we purchased today (Wednesday) will probably not make it into the house until at least Friday or Saturday. It is just one of those things I like to do. No one likes a dirty tree in the house. I am sure that Nancy will be following up this entry with the other view of this most important tradition.

It's starting to feel a lot like Christmas!

Sunday, December 02, 2007

Just Because

Heaven knows I take a zillion photos but I finally got the photo that captures what I see all the time in our cutie little Grace. Where has three months gone? I can't be "done" with a little face like this looking at me all the time. Don't worry, I'm not committing myself either way but a look like this is what it's all about for me.

P.S. Gracie is also getting full face time on the blog because I had to choose a photo for the Christmas Card photo that wasn't her best. The true sacrifice of a mother is having to choose the picture with the greatest percentage of kids looking good even at the expense of one kid not looking as great. Of course, the ultimate deciding factor of a family photo choice is the one where the mom looks good regardless of everyone else. I didn't have to worry about that one this year.